Mission

Spent the last two weeks of my life with some of the most amazing people I have ever met, in the most poverty stricken places I have ever been. Two things stand apparent in my mind.

One, as an American I am highly blessed. Two, no matter where you come from and no matter how much you have... no matter what people enter or leave your life... at some point we all find ourselves broken... and we need the One who made us to save us. People need to hear that there is something worth living for and that someone out there has sent His people to find you and lead you to him.

He will never leave you without a light.

Who Can Take The Sting...

Who Can Take The Sting From Death?

Who Can Take The Sting From Loneliness?

Who Can Take The Sting From Hurt?

Who Can Take The Sting From Our Mistakes?!

This world has proven to be a place of great darkness and great light. It is although we walk along the blade’s edge… we tread the blade afraid of its sharp bite. WE slip and fall, leaving scars we’ll never forget. Sometimes we wonder why we even try… no matter how long we walk this path and no matter how careful we are… we still feel the sting of the blade. We are trapped by our mistakes… wounded by our transgressions… bled for our sins.

The hardest part is doing it alone. Though at times we are accompanied by another soul to help us along… we find the slightest slip scares them away… and so we walk the line in hopes of finding someone to walk it with us. Sometimes we are cut by those who take up our line… sometimes they leave us bleeding… sometimes they fall short…

And… when we are in the dark… and the whole world seems so far away… when death seems to creep upon our skin… when we are alone with our thoughts and our regrets we find that we never had a chance… we never would walk the whole way and we always knew it… and yet in hopes we continued on… but now there is no hope… no light… nothing to hold on to nothing to weather the night.

It is in that dark that a light begins to shine, a strength begins to manifest.

The blade is shattered…

A champion is here.

In our darkest hour, we find ourselves on our knees… in the shadow of a blood stained cross. Suddenly we find that our scars are gone and the blade no longer holds sway of our lives. You see… there on the cross rests a man whom bares our scars… and on his hands are the marks of his covenant with us… a blood bond… written in His eyes is a truth we never knew was possible… “I Have Been There. The Whole Way. I Know How Deep Your Scars Go. I Have Taken Them. I Know How Long Your Wounds Carry, I Have Bore Them. I Know How Far The Blade Stretches. I Have Ran It. For You, I Have Broken It. For You I Have Conquered It. Today, MY Love… I Have Dove Into Your Darkest Hour And Pulled You From It. Today, You Are Free To Love.

Slow To Anger...

The NIV says: “My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,” [James 1:19] This of course being a mention of Godliness mentioned in [Psalm 145:8] “The LORD is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love.”

I find that I am not often, but on occasion known for being rather quick to anger. I have a quick fuse and while difficult to light, the fuse is very short…

The very idea that I feel entitled to become angry at any individual is absurd. I have sinned no less than them and I have been no less selfish than others… and yet I feel anger towards others when they display selfish desires… what a strange creature the human is.

Interesting that the Psalmist there uses love as a contrast to anger. You see, it is difficult to be angry at someone you feel love towards. I find that when my heart is full of love and my mind is meditating on love, I am truly slow to anger. My patients is increased exponentially…

If we can learn to slow our speech, to slow our anger, and rather walk in love towards each other on a regular basis we find that difficulties become so much smaller. You see, I have found that long hours of patients and grace can be easily destroyed by short minutes of anger and frustration. Let us then strive my friends to first attune our hearts and our minds to our God, before ever speaking or interacting with His children.

"Have You Passed Through This Night?"

I came across this video from Explosions in the Sky. The dialogue is taken from the movie Thin Red Line. It truly speaks to the human heart and the horrors of war.

"This great evil. Where does it come from? How'd it steal into the world? What seed, what root did it grow from? Who's doin' this? Who's killin' us? Robbing us of life and light. Mockin' us with the sight of what we might've known. Does our ruin benefit the earth? Does it help the grass to grow, the sun to shine? Is this darkness in you, too? Have you passed through this night?"

The True Fight For Glory

The most important and always the most difficult fights are those that are misunderstood. When the line seems to quiver... to wave... the one that forces you to be misunderstood... hated... rejected... the ones that require your life... without reward... without appreciation... without praise... it makes me wonder... did Mary count the costs of her life? Did she understand the repercussions of her choice? Or did she not even need to think about it?

How man of us are willing to bite the bullet? To forsake the Love of others in favor of your love for them? How many of us truly can take up that cross? How many of us truly understand that Jesus was not talking about a physical Martyr? That to truly take up that cross is so much more... to be misunderstood... to be forsaken... lost... forgotten...

How many of our brothers and sisters stand alone... in obedience...? Oh how harsh has our religion cut them? How deep have we betrayed their faith and love...? How diligent are their hearts? How patient are their spirits? How meek is their strength...?

Father, forgive my selfish heart and unloving tone with which I have painted a bleak life. Let the colors of your love and mercy flow freely and openly upon the canvas of my soul... let your joy and peace overtake and overwhelm me. That in time my heart might be made new.... in the image of the cross... that among the misunderstandings and rejections... that a man will arise from the ashes of a dead and broken world and that he will bear your signature... don your armor... wield your sword... and speak with your truth... that on his back he may carry your salvation to all those who are willing to receive it... unyielding... unshaken... unrelenting... uncompromising... utterly and completely sold out and purchased by your blood.

Father... I pray that you teach me to build a fortress of your heart around my own. Teach me to withstand the cold... to endure the beating winds... to resist the burning fires... to put to death that pain and sorrow in which tries to entangle and control me... to have dominance over my heart and choose to use it for the betterment of my people... my world and my God.

Body, Mind, & Soul

What is it in a man that makes him kill? Where does our rage come from? Our Pride... our Sin... where my friend, does Lust derive it's origins? What is it, in those last seconds before the final blow is dealt... before the final shot is fired... what is it that defines a man?

You see... amiss the smoke and cries... in the heat of the fight... we find out who we truly are... we find that Loyalty... honor... integrity... they are the only true weapons... that our skills are drastically overshadowed by our vision for their purpose. That when the dust settles... when the last shot is fired... and you finally win... you find that you are the real enemy. That among the blood and the death... you were its harbinger.

Let us strive my friends to fight the good fight... to conquer the body mind and soul.... let us teach them to obey. Let us discover something about ourselves... something we never knew... that fighting is more than winning... its about discovering everything about yourself...

Its about discovering... the greatest warrior who ever lived... in the end... when He could have beaten us all... he laid it all down... and paid our depts... won our victory... and exposed to us all who He really was... an in so doing... who we really are.

The Call

Don't you understand? I hear you, through all the lies. I see you through all the walls. I can feel you through all the armor. To me, you are naked. You can try, but you can't keep out the sunlight.

Bar the windows with your shame. Barricade the doors with your failure. Hide behind the mountain of your defeat. You can not keep me away. No strong arm can hold me down. No great depth can separate me.

Stand. Fight. I have called upon my Army. To arms, raise my standard once again. Here, take my armor. Take my sword. Fight. Don't waver. Don't yield. No quarter. Never give up. With every last breath. Fight. No matter the cost. Fight.

Do you not hear the battle drums? Can you not feel their quake? It is war. Wipe away your tears. Purify yourself. He comes for you. My most beautiful prize. He comes to take you. To corrupt you. He has come for my bride. Fight.

Do you not feel it?! The knife. It slashes. It stabs. It cuts deep. Fight! These wounds. You must fight. I see the blood. I feel the breaks. Fight.

Feel my scream. Taste my anger. Let lose my fury, from the depth of your being. Fight. You are not alone. Can't you feel it?! Filling every crack. Touching every wound. I am with you. I will never leave. I would never leave. Faithful to the end.

You are my soldier. You are my knight. My champion. My image. I have made you, shaped you and armed you to carry my name. In your heart I have hidden my Words. In your soul I have left my mark. I carry your name upon my hand. I bare its bond on my back and in my blood. I purchased you from death itself. And on your shoulders I rest my righteousness. In your hands I leave my promise.
In this world I let lose my son. I let lose a man. Wondrous is he that bares my image. Fearfully he walks this earth. Wonderful is his obedience. Beautiful is his love.


Fight, my love. Fight for me.

I am your father, I am your God.

I live in you.

Strength To Stand

It is the strongest among us that are found broken and beaten. They have a strength inside them that says I will not fall, I will not be overtaken. A God given ability to resist destruction and stand against all odds. It is this ability that makes them the target of the misfortunes of life. It is because of this ability that all the forces of hell rise against them. Their strength is turned into a weakness. They are deceived into thinking that they can do it alone, that they are strong enough to overcome anything. Then when the deck is stacked against them and the forces of hell are setting at their doorstep they have no where to turn, they find themselves alone with no way out. They find that through all their strength they can not resist the whole world alone. They have no choice but to fold, they have no choice but to fall.

Because if these warriors could grasp the strength given to them by God and acknowledge where their strength lies that they could defy the Devils and destroy their pride. They could stop fighting for themselves and start fighting for what truly matters and we would see such a change in our generation where we will stand defiant against hell its self and tell Satan that HE WILL NOT PREVAIL. That we are purchased with a price and no trickery or pride will separate us from our God. That our generation will say enough is enough, our lives are not our own. It will be a day that we will not have to stand alone but along side the creator of all things and if he is with us, who could stand against us.

That will be the day that Love will prevail. That will be the day with no more tears. It is our responsibility as the strong to protect the weak, stand up generation.

DNA Camp

After graduating from High School, I began to get into the word of God, I would memorize powerful verses and pray as much as possible. Christianity was still very new to me and I still had much to learn, much to wrap my mind around. Thats when Gary had the idea to send me and his son Dakota, to DNA summer camp.

Gary is such a blessing in my life, just because he knows the value of a human being and he knows that no measure of money could account for it. He has given generously out of his own pocket for me, and taken me in like his own son. I thank and glorify God for his son, Gary.

When I arrived at my Church, where we all met to get on the bus to camp, I was greeted by many of our Churches interns and various amazing people of God. After everyone arrived and the "faith bus" was ready, we set off. I would just like to note, we called the bus the faith bus due to the fact that it was really a van and that the van ran purely on our faith and prayer.

We arrived at camp and waited in line for all of the paper work and such to get done. Dakota as usual was no more patient than expected. After everything was settled we were placed in cabins which consisted of a small room with 3 bunk-beds in them. We set our things down and went to organize with the rest of the camp.

Things were awkward at first, meeting new people get to know them organizing everyone and such. We were all given separate teams, mine was 7. We were then given a number in the team, mine was again 7.  One organized we created team names and team chants (they were so terrible we never ended up using them, haha.). Most of the camp consisted of various games and team activities which were a blast, however the best part of the camp was the evening and morning services. The spirit of God was so thick and powerful, you could physically feel it. Pastor Chad brought the word every single time.

Everything went smoothly until we got to the Basketball game. We had just gotten back from swimming and I was wearing flip flops. I wanted to play barefoot but apparently the court was tearing up peoples feet so shoes were mandatory. I was the tallest on my team so I did the jump shot. Well when I jumped up me and the other boy hit each other and I came down on my foot and rolled it. As you can imagine, that would be bad. It ripped a good chunk out of my foot and hurt a bit. I ignored it, trying very hard to be manly and I prayed over it and ran into my bunk and got my Converse. I used the sock to soak up the blood and then went back to playing. When we got to the next pool event, I had to take off my shoes and when I did I noticed that my foot was much larger now than before. It had a giant bulge swelling up on one side. I thought that it might be necessary to talk to a nurse... just in case. When I showed them my foot, they told me it was likely a blow blood vessel and I absolutely had to put ice on it. I did so and had the others pray for it. The next day I simply told the Devil he couldn't make me limp and continued to play the games, I ignored any pain. By the end of the camp, my foot was working perfectly. As long as I acted in accordance to the the belief that my foot was healed there was no pain. It was when I limped and complained that it began to hurt.

To go into the detail of the services and the people I met would take me days and more than any person would want to read. So I will just say the God changed a lot of lives there, there were healing, re-dedications, and prophetic word. While at a leadership meeting, Sean Gleason was randomly prophesied over, the speaker didn't know why he said what he said, only that it was from God.

There were so many testimonies it was absolutely wonderful, I won't mention them just for the sake of the individuals. All in all it was well worth the time and money spent and it got me closer to my Brother-In-Christ, Sean Gleason.

When we got back from the camp, Sean began to get me involved with our youth interns and in time I became one. The friends and experiences I have gained from God are so mind blowing and amazing it seems unreal. God works on my heart each day as I serve and seek Him. I thank God for my friends and the ability to serve him. God is good.