Dying daily...

...and suddenly it came to me... if we ever want to change this world... if we ever want to stop the cycle of pain and suffering that so bitterly grips this world since the days of Adam... we must do as Christ so boldly proclaimed. We must put ourselves down. We have to give up... some of our greatest dreams. Forsake... some of our most desired things. Ultimately we must give ourselves up. We must give it up. Though at times we feel that we can... its not a matter of making a single decision. It doesn't happen all at once. Its the slowest and most painful way to die. To watch each thing that you once held dear... the vanity of this world... fall away... until you are naked and without leaves. And though... none will ever know the pain... and exactly how much you gave up... the thing that you most desperately wanted. The thing that kept you going all along will finally be obtainable. Finally change. Finally we can break the cycle.

How powerful the cross was... that still today it calls men and women to die that painful death. To grab hold on to an eternal life.

3 years ago in middle of the night... I begged Him to tell me how to change this. To take this pain away... so willing to forsake my life... so willing to endure the pain... though deceived as I was... Light came in and gave me Hope. Suddenly a way was made. Through the continual death of myself and His people. Life enters this world.